Promises. We do make them a lot. Even if we don't have any intentions of keeping them. How many of us have promised God we would become a monk or nun if He got us out of a jam? Or, made promises to our parents to keep ourselves out of punishment? So, we do make some promises we know we won't keep. Others we do keep and others we try and fail to.
When one gets married, we make promises to each other. Vows. What we will do for each other. These are typically made in front of friends and family. Love, Honor, and Cherish. Maybe, obey ;) These are promises that are not made lightly. These are serious commitments made to the one we plan on spending the rest of our lives with. As such, pretty important. We make them for public consumption and keep them in private as well.
If you are married, I do hope and pray that you are doing your best to keep your vows. I try, some days better than others. There can be many distractions thrown our way. Life gets in the way sometimes. Our focus is diverted onto other things causing strains on the marriage. Mostly, we can become more self-centered and less focused on our spouse. Worrying more about what we are getting out of life, rather than giving. Taking care of oneself is important, but we cannot become all-consuming in our marriage. Just looking out for our best interests at the expense of others. If we are selfish, our spouse tends to be the first affected by this attitude.
Both parties in a marriage need to look out for the other's well being. When both parties fight for each other, the bonds become stronger. Marriage is not a 50/50 proposition. It is a 100/100 proposition. Full effort from both sides is necessary. Sadly, sometimes, one member bears the full effort. Hoping the other will change or that it's on them to carry the burden.
Eventually, that burden, over time, will cause you to crack. We are not meant to shoulder it all on our own. Yes, there will be times that we will need to carry the burden for our spouse. I have and Susan has for me. Those times when we don't see a way, the other provides us encouragement and strength. It is honorable to do that for each other. But, it can't remain forever on one's shoulders. It involves teamwork. It is hard work, to be honest, but things worth fighting for are seldom easy. People can hurt each other, often unintentionally. The same is true of any relationship, especially marriage. We need to bless each other in our marriages. As a matter of fact, I would recommend not shutting yourselves off from the world. Just the two of you fighting it out at the expense of friends and family. A network of family and friends who are there to pray, encourage, listen, and hold you accountable helps to make the bonds stronger.
"Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken" Ecclesiastes 4:12.
An example of a strong marriage. You, your spouse, and God compose those three strands. Inviting God in your marriage can only make it stronger. Praying together, reading the Bible, going to church together are ways to invite God. Walks in the park together just being together in nature. Jesus was all about sacrificial love. This is why the relationship between Jesus and His church is portrayed as a marriage. This is the framework and standards we use for our marriages.
The vows we make should not be treated frivolously. There are some who believe marriage is one big happy ever after and are surprised when there is work involved and speed bumps. The vows do say sickness and health, good times and bad. We need to expect that there will be struggles at times. Hopefully, not so many to cause us to despair.
I can't imagine my life without Susan. Not, that I didn't have good times when I was single - but it is something difficult to describe. That connection. Goes beyond friendship, fun times, support, etc.. There's such a deep connection between us that I can never foresee a time that we will be apart. Yes, I would die for her. That feels like a cord of three strands. Good analogy, God.
The promises we make to each other are important. If your actions do not match up to your words, what good are your words. If I acted opposite of what I said to Susan, why should she trust me in the future? The vows I made on my wedding day are that important. Eight years later, just as important to me as the day I spoke them. More important are my actions toward her since that day. Staying true to the vows I made to her. Only way I have been as successful keeping them is to invite God into our marriage.
When one gets married, we make promises to each other. Vows. What we will do for each other. These are typically made in front of friends and family. Love, Honor, and Cherish. Maybe, obey ;) These are promises that are not made lightly. These are serious commitments made to the one we plan on spending the rest of our lives with. As such, pretty important. We make them for public consumption and keep them in private as well.
If you are married, I do hope and pray that you are doing your best to keep your vows. I try, some days better than others. There can be many distractions thrown our way. Life gets in the way sometimes. Our focus is diverted onto other things causing strains on the marriage. Mostly, we can become more self-centered and less focused on our spouse. Worrying more about what we are getting out of life, rather than giving. Taking care of oneself is important, but we cannot become all-consuming in our marriage. Just looking out for our best interests at the expense of others. If we are selfish, our spouse tends to be the first affected by this attitude.
Both parties in a marriage need to look out for the other's well being. When both parties fight for each other, the bonds become stronger. Marriage is not a 50/50 proposition. It is a 100/100 proposition. Full effort from both sides is necessary. Sadly, sometimes, one member bears the full effort. Hoping the other will change or that it's on them to carry the burden.
Eventually, that burden, over time, will cause you to crack. We are not meant to shoulder it all on our own. Yes, there will be times that we will need to carry the burden for our spouse. I have and Susan has for me. Those times when we don't see a way, the other provides us encouragement and strength. It is honorable to do that for each other. But, it can't remain forever on one's shoulders. It involves teamwork. It is hard work, to be honest, but things worth fighting for are seldom easy. People can hurt each other, often unintentionally. The same is true of any relationship, especially marriage. We need to bless each other in our marriages. As a matter of fact, I would recommend not shutting yourselves off from the world. Just the two of you fighting it out at the expense of friends and family. A network of family and friends who are there to pray, encourage, listen, and hold you accountable helps to make the bonds stronger.
"Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken" Ecclesiastes 4:12.
An example of a strong marriage. You, your spouse, and God compose those three strands. Inviting God in your marriage can only make it stronger. Praying together, reading the Bible, going to church together are ways to invite God. Walks in the park together just being together in nature. Jesus was all about sacrificial love. This is why the relationship between Jesus and His church is portrayed as a marriage. This is the framework and standards we use for our marriages.
The vows we make should not be treated frivolously. There are some who believe marriage is one big happy ever after and are surprised when there is work involved and speed bumps. The vows do say sickness and health, good times and bad. We need to expect that there will be struggles at times. Hopefully, not so many to cause us to despair.
I can't imagine my life without Susan. Not, that I didn't have good times when I was single - but it is something difficult to describe. That connection. Goes beyond friendship, fun times, support, etc.. There's such a deep connection between us that I can never foresee a time that we will be apart. Yes, I would die for her. That feels like a cord of three strands. Good analogy, God.
The promises we make to each other are important. If your actions do not match up to your words, what good are your words. If I acted opposite of what I said to Susan, why should she trust me in the future? The vows I made on my wedding day are that important. Eight years later, just as important to me as the day I spoke them. More important are my actions toward her since that day. Staying true to the vows I made to her. Only way I have been as successful keeping them is to invite God into our marriage.
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